2 months later

So how are we doing? We are doing okay! We have our up days and our down days - but we are figuring it out day by day :-)

When we first brought Mia home, it was such a special but nerve wracking time. This was it, we were going to be responsible for this little girl on our own (well with a little help from my mum!)! Now that's a responsibility! We were't expecting Mia to be born so soon, so though we were ready, we weren't ready, if that makes any sense?!!

She was here, in our home, finally.

If I was to sum up, I would say it was a learning experience. It still IS a learning experience. Everyday! From nappy changes, to learning to differentiate between cries, to figuring out just how to get anything else done in the day. On top of that, there was the recovery process, given that I was still in pain and so very tired!

Fast forward 2 months, and here we are, still learning. The change in Mia is literally day to day. Just when we think we have one thing figured, the next day it will change. For example, there were a couple days where it seemed as though she was getting into a bit of a sleep and feed pattern - we thought 'great, we can be a bit more prepared for what she needs and when', but then the next day was totally different story! This has happened a few times now - you would think that we would learn that it's forever changing, but no, we live in hope lol!

Getting anything else done in the day aside from feeding and changing Mia? We don't! End of story lol!

Sleep? Well what's that anymore??!! Our Mia is a party girl and doesn't like to sleep until at least midnight :-(. Though the upside is that we get more time with her, the downside is that though she is clearly soon tired, she will just fight the sleep. She will start to fall asleep, realise what is happening and wake herself up. The worst part is though, that she isn't even happy to be awake. She wants to sleep! Clearly she has FOMO (Fear of Missing Out, for those not in the know!). FOMO at 2 months old! It's a battle each night to get her to sleep, which isn't fun for anyone, and you kinda end up feeling like she might hate you for trying to force her to sleep. For a sleep deprived first-time parent, when all you want to do is sleep, and your baby just won't go to sleep so that you can sleep, it's a 'pulling your hair out' moment! You keep getting through the days though - I don't know how, but you do!

Aside from the adjustments of day to day, the changes in Mia from the day she was born are amazing! You could tell that she had a strong character from the start but I didn't realise just how strong. She knows what she wants already and doesn't do anything she doesn't want to do! If she is being fed from a bottle and doesn't want to drink anymore, no matter what, she just won't drink. She keeps her mouth firmly closed and won't budge. If she is asleep and I try and wake her to feed, all the tricks in the book will not work on her. We were told to take her clothes off, blow on her face, trickle water on her face etc, but it would work the first time, and she would realise what is happening, and then remember for next time! Don't get me wrong, I never wake her for no reason, it is only when she falls asleep during a feed and hasn't had enough yet, but we have now run out of options, which means giving her a bottle of expressed milk more often than I would like.

All in all - we are so in love with this little girl, but it's hard. No surprise there, as I haven't come across a single parent who has said the first 6 months were easy. Every second is worth it though. I must admit, I was a bit worried that we wouldn't be able to cope, and you hear all these stories about postnatal depression, so I've had that in the back of my mind. Honestly though, I just get on with it. Postnatal depression is a very serious illness, and because I was conscious of the fact that people often don't even realise that it is happening, I wanted to make sure that I try to stay positive even through the challenging times. The way I see it, and its just my opinion, you can either resent this little baby for things which just aren't in their control, which is clearly not healthy for anyone, of you can get on with it, and enjoy your baby. Yes you will be enjoying your baby whilst trying to even stay awake, but you will enjoy them all the same. I do believe this leads to a happier baby - at least that's what the smiles I get when I'm playing with her tell me. One smile and I melt. She has me, exhausted or not. 2 months down, and a long way to still go...!!